Home Dating Reclaiming Your Space, Without a Fight
Reclaiming Your Space, Without a Fight
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Friday, 24 April 2009 22:00

reclaiming-your-spaceEvery guy knows that opening up your space to share with a woman can be tough. It has become quite clear that women, while wonderful, are confusing and bold individuals. The minute you open up your door for your partner to move in, the feminizing starts.

It usually starts with a vase with some flowers, then a pink blanket or two and before you know it your entire place is covered in candles and flowers and your bathroom is drowning in girlie unmentionables. So you can’t help but stop and ask, “how am I suppose to get my space back without her thinking I don’t want her here?” It’s not as hard as it seems, you just have to know which angle to work. If you are sharing your space with a woman, you need to know that if you want any sort of man-space left, you need to give her an area that she can do whatever she wants with. Designating areas is a way for both of you to have your own space, and there is a complete fairness, so no break ups necessary.

The Biggest Mistakes Guys Make when Trying to Share Their Space

There are a lot of things that can just give your woman the wrong idea, which is why you need to prepare before you ask or allow a female to move into your space. Things aren’t going to be the same no matter what you do, having your girlfriend move into your place is not the same as having one of your buddies crashing on your couch, and women take things in on a deeper level, so you have to think before you act. The biggest mistake most guys make when they have their girlfriends move in is just opening the door and saying make yourself at home, without any time to prepare.

You should think about what is important in your space before you decide how this is going to work, and guys, asking a girl to move in should not mean the same night you asked her. You have to think about what you find important, and what you are willing to let go. This whole process will require you to sacrifice some of yourself and your space. You can’t just section off a five by five space in your apartment and call it a day either, when two people are combining spaces, they need to have room spread throughout the house. For instance, in the bathroom make a space for her and a space for you. Same with the bedroom and the rest of the house, you have to think combination.

The Subtle Explanation, Don’t Make Her Cry!

After you’ve decided what space you are willing to give up make sure to explain things subtly. Because guys aren’t known for making things delicate, a bad example of what to say would be, “can you keep your [insert item here] out/away from my [insert place here].” That may seem harmless, but it is offensive to most women. Instead, try telling her when she first gets there “Hey, I thought you might like your own area” and continue to show her what places you’ve emptied for her, this way she feels honored that you cleared out your own space to make room for her and she also has a place to put her things.

I Already Opened My Door, and I Have No Space Anymore

So after you have already opened your door and surrendered your space, you can’t get it back, right? Wrong, the truth is you can always reclaim your man-pad and it’s not as hard as you might think. Most women aren’t going to freak out over your needs as long as you present them the right way. You are going to get back a good reaction if you phrase your dissatisfaction as if it’s just a question, and not a complaint. Complaining to her is going to make her feel unwelcomed, but a question seems as if you are really considering her thoughts and opinions in your decision.

I Want My House Back, Please?

Always start with her feelings first. For instance, make this conversation seem like you want her to know you respect her wishes, and are suggesting things. A good example of a conversational starter when you want to get your space back would be something like, “Hey, do you mind if I put [item or items] in our [space/place] instead of [item or items that are there]” or “What do you think about me having my own [space/item/etc]?” this is a great way to make her feel welcomed and involved in the decisions, and the fact that you came to her before acting will let her know you are ready to share your space instead of still thinking it is yours alone.

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