Home Entertainment Jokes Festival Jokes New Year Resolutions for Pets

Latest Jokes

I just had a dream about it
|A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for... Read more...
Im sending out some cards
|A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink... Read more...
Real Church Bloopers...
|? Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help. ? Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow. ? Remember in prayer the many who... Read more...
Do you go to church?
|A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my... Read more...

Beautiful dresses at vicyc.com or buy nice looking Full Lace Wigs at dhgate.com along with cheap dresses online

Buy from a choice of thousands of products with Worldwide Free Shipping for every orders you place like the best place to buy cheap dresses online.
New Year Resolutions for Pets
(0 votes, average: 0 out of 5)
Festival Jokes
Sunday, 25 June 2006 19:00

|15. I will not eat other animals' poop. 14. I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.13. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table. 12. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.11. I will no longer be beholden to the sound of the can opener.10. Cats: Circulate a petition that sleeping become a juried competition in major animal shows. 9. Come to understand that cats are from Venus; dogs are from Mars.8. Take time from busy schedule to stop and smell the behinds.7. Hamster: Don't let them figure out I'm just a rat on steroids, or they'll flush me! 6. Get a bite in on that freak who gives me that shot every year.5. Grow opposable thumb; break into pantry; decide for MYSELF how much food is *too* much.4. Cats: Use new living room sofa as scratching post. 3. January 1st: Kill the sock! Must kill the sock!January 2nd - December 31: Re-live victory over the sock. 2. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff. AND the Number 1 New Year's Resolutions Made by Pets...1. I will NOT chase the stick until I see it LEAVE THE IDIOT'S HAND
Comments (0)add
Write comment

busy