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Tags|Q: What's the definition of a nerd?A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet.Q: Why do clarinetists leave their cases on the dashboard?A: So they can park in the handicap zones.Q: What do you call a bass-clarinetist with half a brain?A: Gifted.Q: What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?A: Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces.Q: How do know a clarinet player is playing loud?A: You can almost hear them.Q: How do you get a clarinet player to play louder?A: You can't!
Comments
(20)
written by Mintleaf , June 15, 2007
Those jokes are soooooooooooo rude. i play the clarinet, so are you calling me a nerd?
Votes: -1
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written by drfish , July 06, 2007
If you can't tell, you're definitely a clarinetist.
Votes: +0
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written by joedirt7 , August 09, 2007
i think these jokes are funny... and i play clarinet. lighten up, and see the humor!!!
Votes: +3
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written by BassClarinet2012! , October 10, 2007
Haha these are great! I play the clarinet and the bass clarinet, and I have no hard feelings, lighten' up a bit will ya? 
Votes: +2
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written by BassClarinetGirl , December 10, 2007
These are funny. I don't care if you say I am gifted because I have half a brain. You need to laugh at yourself sometimes. 
Votes: +0
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written by BassClarinetGirl , December 10, 2007
These are funny! You need to laugh at yourself sometimes.
Votes: +1
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written by harry the clarry , January 25, 2008
they made me laugh! i play the clarinet too! bothered?? no!! lol! i just think of all the jokes they make about the strings - hahaha - woodwind are soooo much better!! we may seem dumb, but we'r are far cooler and more laid back! 
Votes: +2
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written by clarinet24 , February 01, 2008
i don't really have too much of a problem with these jokes. sure they're mean but they're not half as bad as the other instruments. and i am perfectly fine with being a geek because, i kinda am. although i do hold to the fact that that's just a coincedience. i agree with harry the clarry by-the-way.
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written by Thatonegirl , February 02, 2008
Ah these are so funny. And I play the clarinet. Do I find them offensive, no. Whoever does takes this way too seriously.
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written by coolclarinet , February 10, 2008
i LOVE clarinet jokes. i play it.
(P.S)What do you call a bass-clarinetist with half a brain? Gifted.-that is so true. too bad no one in my class has that much brain.
Votes: +1
(P.S)What do you call a bass-clarinetist with half a brain? Gifted.-that is so true. too bad no one in my class has that much brain.
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written by KickinBrass , April 18, 2008
Hil-ari-ous!
I play trumpet and our clarinets are always out of it so these are totally hilarious and very realistic.
Votes: -1
I play trumpet and our clarinets are always out of it so these are totally hilarious and very realistic.
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written by dominique , May 23, 2008
stop hating on us.. we are just as good as any other players who play clarinet!!!!!!!!!!
Votes: -1
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written by clarinetfan101 , June 23, 2008
I think these jokes are very rude. 
Votes: -1
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written by Mirel , September 07, 2008
these are so stu[id..i play the clarinet....and those jokes are very rude
Votes: -1
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written by viviensuperstar , September 18, 2008
im a clarinetist, i find them hilarious :]
Votes: +1
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written by clarinetmaniac , September 28, 2008
oh those jokes are so mean i play the clarinet and it is a fun instrument
Votes: -1
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written by Clarinet Idol 999 , October 20, 2008
How do you make a Clarinet sound like an Alto Sax? Play random notes and squeak a lot!
Why are clarinets like lawsuits? Everyone's happy once the case is closed!
Votes: +1
Why are clarinets like lawsuits? Everyone's happy once the case is closed!
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written by clarinet made of CRYSTAL , December 05, 2008
lol 
these are funny but i just had a thought... 
yes scary i no... anyway so if we only have half a brain and we play almost the hardest instrument (most keys to learn)then how much brains do all the other instruments have??? HA BURN!!
Votes: +0
these are funny but i just had a thought... yes scary i no... anyway so if we only have half a brain and we play almost the hardest instrument (most keys to learn)then how much brains do all the other instruments have??? HA BURN!! report abuse
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